The Heelers Diaries

the fantasy world of ireland's greatest living poet

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Location: Kilcullen (Phone 087 7790766), County Kildare, Ireland

Tuesday, October 17, 2006

if you live long enough you'll see everything

Phonecall from the bun.
"Jamie you won't believe what happened today."
"What happened?"
"I was in Little Caesars Restaurant having my dinner and they were really awful to me."
Ah. This is a place in Dublin. Low low rent. I brought she who knows not fate to it when we first met five years ago. I thought the waiters were rude and never went back.
She on the other hand did go back. Frequently. And much to my chagrin.
In fact it seemed any time she was bored with my company, she could just declare: "I'm going to dinner at Little Caesars tonight," in the sure knowledge I would not be going along. She did this a lot.
Anyway, it's five years since I cared whether the staff of Little Caesar's lived or died. (Okay, strictly speaking if I was filling in a consumer survey I might admit to a slight preference that they should go beneath the earth retching blood... And be immolated for all eternity in the seventh ring of hell.)
So, all in the past for me.
If they're rude to me once, it's their fault. Twice and it's mine.
But I digress.
Where were we?
Oh yes.
Big Hair's tale of woe.
"I was in there today and I complained about the orange juice and the waiter was really sarcastic. He explained in a really condescending voice that all the glasses were clean and the orange juice was fresh. And then he poured my orange juice into another glass and tasted it. It was just the way he did it. He was really lousy. So I just wanted to say you were right."
A moment's silence.
"Jamie?"
"Hodders I'm stunned."
"Why?"
"Because that's the first time in five years you've ever admitted I was right about anything."

2 Comments:

Blogger Chamki said...

Ha ha ha
I do the same thing.
The man who has a shop near college was rude to me when I asked him for change. I never buy anything from there. There is no other shop in that lane.

5:42 AM  
Blogger heelers said...

C
They're rude to you because they're in love with you.
J

2:06 AM  

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