The Heelers Diaries

the fantasy world of ireland's greatest living poet

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Location: Kilcullen (Phone 087 7790766), County Kildare, Ireland

Saturday, May 30, 2009

stephens green

lesser spotted yobs
spreadeagled on the lawn
a long tied businessman
chirps into his phone
golden breasted secretaries
cluster round the fountain
preening at their feathers
and cackling with abandon
whilst an elephantine matron
trumpets for her young
and a herd of student sexalopes
gambol in the sun
each creature happy
in its cacaphonic fate
save a lone wolfen poet
hunting for a mate

judge liberal's greatest hits

More news is breaking about the murderer of 17 year old Swiss student Manuela Riedo.
Gerald Barry is currently serving a life sentence for the killing.
At his sentencing Judge Barry White apologised to Manuela's parents on behalf of the Irish people for their daughter's murder.
(I should add that Judge Barry White is not the famous soul singer Barry White. Judge Barry White is a souless liberal bast--d.)
Some of us thought Judge Barry White's apology was misplaced.
We thought the Irish people had nothing to apologise for.
We considered it was Judge Liberal who should have been apologising.
For himself.
For all the Judge Liberals.
For the entire Liberal judicial establishment.
You see, Manuela's murderer had struck before.
Let's see...
Just the cases we know about obviously.
Gerald Barry had murdered a man in Galway. (Judge Liberal put him in jail for five years, convicting him of a crime Judge Liberal cutely calls manslaughter, and then releasing him to kill again.)
He'd murdered another man. (Judge Liberal and Jury Liberal failed to convict him for this one. He was released to kill again.)
He'd blinded an old age pensioner. (I consider this another murder. He was released to kill again.)
He'd raped a French girl shortly before killing Manuela. (The police say they couldn't find enough evidence to detain him for that particular rape which had occurred seven weeks before he killed Manuela. Last week he was finally convicted in court of the rape of the French girl. Too late for Manuela of course. An example of Judge Liberal bolting the stable door after the murderer has struck. Again.)
He'd breached some sort of a barring order, details of which are not available, and Judge Liberal had allowed him out on bail after this breach. It was while on bail for this breach that he violated, tortured and killed Manuela.

Yes.
Clearly someone should be apologising here.
But let's not hold our breaths.

belling the quinn

Token Catholic at Independent Newspapers David Quinn wrote a long article about sex abuse in the Irish Independent yesterday.
His article was the usual mealy mouthed posturing intended to preserve something of his own credibility while at the same time protecting Independent Newspapers from the charge that it is an anti Catholic organisation.
Yet barely a week ago in the same Irish Independent, a journalist called Ian O'Doherty's claimed that the Catholic church is a paedophile ring.
Independent Newspapers published Ian O'Doherty's lies in a prominent position amid the rest of their anti Catholic dross.
They published his lies under a headline reiterating those lies.
It is difficult to see how a man like David Quinn who makes such a show of claiming to be Catholic, can work for an organisation like Independent Newspapers after Independent Newspapers has published Ian O'Doherty's malign malicious mendacious and manipulative falsehoods.
I assume there's money involved.
I assume David Quinn has been well paid.
David Quinn commented last week:
"For practising Catholics there is only one appropriate response to the report of the Child Abuse Commission and it is one of deep unadulterated shame."
Personally I don't accept David Quinn's instructions as to how I should respond to anything.
I don't consider him a respected commentator on events.
I don't even consider him a Catholic.
I certainly don't look to him as an example of moral probity.
David Quinn is an employee of Tony O'Reilly's anti Catholic Independent Newspapers group.
It is inappropriate for him to tell anyone how to react to the publication of anthing, not even to a Child Abuse Report, and certainly not to Independent Newspapers, the Irish Times and RTE's attempts to recycle old allegations of sex abuse into a new scandal.
The real scandal is that these atheistic pseudo liberal entities (Heelers means Independent Newspapers. - Ed note.) for whom Quinn works are failing to report the true nature and extent of child abuse in Ireland, but are instead hijacking cases involving priests merly to pursue their own power agenda with regard to the destruction of the Catholic church.
My response to David Quinn's suggestion that I should feel shame about the publication of a liberal atheistic judicial report into the tiny minority of sex abuse cases that involve priests, is as follows:
"F--K OFF QUINN YOU GOBSHITE."
Interestingly enough David Quinn's more recent article yesterday lifted some of my own points about sex abuse from this blog.
He noted that the majority of cases did not involve priests and that the public had an incorrect perception of this.
Yes David.
But you failed to note that the public's false perception about priests being responsible for most sex abuse cases, arises solely from the crassly manipulative faux bleeding heart reportage of Independent Newspapers, the Irish Times and RTE.
A strange omission David.
A nocturnal omission.
Straight from hell.
David Quinn cites some statistics about sex abuse.
He claims that 96 percent of sex abuse cases do not involve priests or religious people.
Quinn's figure is taken from an American survey.
It relates only to the cases which actually reach the courts.
It does not include the vast majority of cases which occur in family households and never reach the courts.
In other words it vastly overstates the percentage of cases involving priests.
And even overstating the figures, it concludes that fully 960 sex abuse victims out of every thousand, are abused by family members, neighbours, cousins, rapists, predators, escaped lunatics, etc etc.
Not by priests.
Not by religious people.
Funny that those 960 victims out of every thousand sex abuse cases wouldn't get into the newspapers, isn't it?
We know Independent Newspapers thinks sex abuse victims are important.
They've devoted copious acres of newsprint to telling us so.
But perhaps some victims are more important than others.
Here is the news.
Independent Newspapers is deliberately focussing on the tiny minority of sex abuse cases involving priests, while effectively ignoring the huge preponderance of cases that do not involve priests.
Independent Newspapers, the Irish Times, RTE and other shadowy elites within our political and judicial culture, are doing this for a reason.
They want to destroy the Catholic church as a platform of influence for the general public, and they are using perpetually recycled allegations of sex abuse as a tool for their ends.
This is a kulturkampf the likes of which would embarass Otto Von Bismarck.
(The Kulturkampf or Struggle For Culture was a Prussian attempt to destroy the Catholic church in the 19th century.)
I do not accept David Quinn's statistics even though they hammer home my point.
(A point he has in typical mealy mouthed fashion lifted from this blog.)
Quinn's figures are from an American survey which has not been properly verified and whose compilers probably wished to overstate the figures for sex abuse committed by priests.
Readers will be aware that I have said 99.99 percent of cases do not involve priests.
My own figures were not arrived at lightly.
My conclusions were based on the following reasoning.
Sex abuse is occurring at exponentially increasing levels in households all over Ireland.
It has been at endemic and ever increasing levels since the 1980's.
Virtually all of these cases are occurring in family circles and do not reach court.
These cases are therefore excluded from any figures based on court appearances.
I think this fact must be clear to anyone who genuinely wishes to know the truth about sex abuse.
I think it must be clear to anyone who wants to know the truth about sex abuse so that the victims of abuse may be helped.
All the victims.
Not just the ones who can be hijacked by the Irish Independent, the Irish Times and RTE for their pogrom against the ancient church.
The vast preponderance of sex abuse cases are occurring in family households at the hands of non religious people.
This fact is not in dispute.
It is just ignored in the faux reportage from Independent Newspapers, the Irish Times and RTE.
I repeat.
Fully 99.99 percent of sex abuse cases do not involve priests, nuns or believing Christians.
Independent Newspapers, the Irish Times and RTE, have colluded to convey precisely the opposite impression.
Independent Newspapers, the Irish Times, and RTE have committed the very worst crimes of which they have accused the Bishops.
They have concealed sex abuse.
Simply by not covering it.
Simply by printing pages and pages about priests who commit abuse, and only scant articles about the 99.99 percent of non religious abusers hiding in plain sight.
As for David Quinn.
David Quinn should be ashamed of himself.

Friday, May 29, 2009

chance would be a fine thing

Driving into the city of Dublin in warm sunshine.
The posters of girly girl politicians flash by my window.
Every lamp post is festooned.
Mother Ireland you're rearing them yet.
At the traffic lights near Inchicore, I catch Labour Party candidate Maria Parodi leering down at me suggestively from a poster.
Presumably she's suggesting I vote.
But I couldn't swear to it.
She's sure as hell suggesting something.
An odd cheeriness takes my spirit.
The ghost of Kim Carnes appears in the passenger seat of my car.
Kim Carnes gives me a nudge, points at the poster, and together we launch into a new version of her famous song Betty Davis Eyes.
We sing:

"She's a Labour Party babe.
She's as cold as ice.
She's as pure as Ballymun snow.
She's got Maria Parodi eyes.
She might eat you.
She might beat you.
She floats up there to meet you.
But not like those Fianna Fail goats.
Dangling from the other lamp posts.
She will tempt you and she will treat you.
She wants more than an electoral surprise.
She's got Maria Parodi eyes.
Yes, she's got Maria Parodi eyes.
She will hold you,
She will fold you,
Into a socialist worker she will mould you.
You will notice,
That she knows just what it takes to get your vote-ez.
She's unconcscious,
Of your surmise,
Because she's got Maria Parodi eyes.
Yes she's got Maria Parodi eyes.
She will heat you.
She will sweet you.
She always thanks you when she meets you.
She may want to nationalise the banks.
But she's not like those commie Sinn Fein skanks.
Cos she's got Maria Parodi eyes.
Yes, she's got Maria Parodi eyes."

Me and Kim Carnes laugh a lot at this for truly we are both of us much drawn to the simpler pleasures in life.

our television listings

RTE (The Irish national broadcaster.) 4.25 Murder She Wrote. Jessica discovers a freemasonic cult led by Tom Hanks is trying to subvert the Catholic church. In between times she solves a murder. 5.20 Nuacht. God bless you. 5.30 The Bill. The cops of Hill Street just fail to thwart an Al Qaeda attack which leaves London a smoking hole in the ground. Special guest star David Milliband playing himself, delivers the classic one liner: "The war on terror was a mistake. Muslim warrior super heroes are our friends." (That's two classic one liners surely? - Ed note.) 6.00 The Angelus. 6.01 News. 7.00 Meet The Neighbours. An Afghan couple prepare for their daughter's Dublin wedding. Multi culti programme intended to promote diversity. Tonights episode does not feature the Black Jackets Muslim crime gang whose members are currently harassing citizens on Grafton Street, O'Connell Street, Henry Street and throughout the city centre. The gang meets daily in the Kylemore Cafe on O'Connell Street where security staff turn a blind eye to their activities. Members of the gang work in the Kylemore. One Pakistani member has risen to a management position at the Kylemore outlet based in the Stephens Green Centre. He's got a lot of anger. At least he has when he's shoulder jostling Irish people in the streets with his gang. The programme will not explore the Black Jackets successful infiltration of security firms at the Ilac and Stephens Green Centre as well as the gang's placement of enforcers on the staff at the Westbury Hotel, the Cafe Kylemore, Mao's Cafe and McDonalds. Particular attention will not be paid to the murder of an Irish teenager on Grafton Street a few years ago. The 19 year old was beaten to death outside a fastfood restaurant, (guess which one), by an Algerian Arab with a baseball bat. The Algerian Arab found other Arabs to testify in court that the 19 year old had made racist remarks to the Algerian Arab who beat him to death with a baseball bat. Judge Liberal released the Algerian Arab because Judge Liberal has decided that beating Irish people to death with baseball bats is now legal as long as you're an Algerian Arab with plenty of Arab friends willing to tell lies in court. 7.30 Eastenders. Al Qaeda nukes the parts of the East End they missed in tonight's earlier episode of The Bill. Cor blimey.. 8.00 Fair City. Soap opera. Al Qaeda launches an anthrax attack on Dublin. 8.30 Off The Rails. Fashion programme. As a prelude to the new season this programme sets out to try to blah, blah, f---ing blah. 9.00 News. 9.30 The Late Late Show. Chat show presented by Pat Kenny who is most famous for obtaining a million dollar parcel of land in Dublin through adverse possession. That is to say, through squatting on it. RTE pays Kenny a million quid a year. Lovely, lovely people. Up until recently they refused to publish the amount they were paying him. This is the problem with licence fee TV. RTE had a monopoly so no one was let set up a television station to compete with them. Yet rather than creating as much employment as possible, they shelled out millions to unwatchable politically connected scruff like Kenny, Gerry Ryan and Ryan Tubridy. You could have hired a hundred people a year on entry level wages for the amount they were paying Kenny alone. And among the hundred we'd have found real talent. Another hundred people could have been hired with what they were paying Gerry Ryan. Another hundred with what they paid Tubridy. You could still have paid Kenny et al fifty grand each to keep them in the style to which they'd become accustomed.. No need to throw them out on the streets. After all, RTE is not a monster. It's not the Johnston Press. It's merely a ferociously incompetent anti Catholic propaganda machine for clapped out left wing causes. Okay, okay. It is a monster. But it's not the Johnston Press. I could never call RTE the Johnston Press. Because I've no intention of committing libel here. 11.40 News. Barack goooooood. George Bush baaaaaad. Mussssslimm warrrriorrrr super heroessssss are ourrrr friennnnnnnds. Goooo toooo sleeeeeeeep. 11.50 Nurse Betty. Film starring Renee Zellwegger. A waitress becomes convinced she's the fiancee of a soap star. If fifty people in Ireland watch this, my name is Ernst Von Steinervortzel The Third. 1.50 Telly Bingo. Civilisation is coming to an end. 2.00 Shortland Street. 2.30 Nationwide. In case you missed it earlier. 2.55 Doctor Phil. A spinoff from the Oprah Winfrey chatshow. The most intellectual thing on RTE today.

morning becomes a heelers

Morning coffee in the Copper Kettle cafe on Kilcullen Main Street.
Mortonson arrives and thrusts a document in front of me.
I read it.
The contents allege that the owner of Independent Newspapers Mr Tony O'Reilly is the son of an Irish Civil Servant and some half wit who slept with him.
That is to say, the document alleges O'Reilly's parents were not married.
A great weariness falls upon me.
After all this time.
This.
So O'Reilly had as big a duty to fight for the Catholic church as I did.
A bigger duty maybe.
For O'Reilly was just the sort of bastard who would have been aborted or contrareceived if Ireland hadn't been a deeply Christian country.
Even our fornicators knew about the sanctity of life.
He owes his very existence to the ancient church.
The same church his leptospirotic employees at Independent Newspapers have been trying to destroy.
I stared bleakly into the middle distance.
It should have been so different.
O'Reilly should have been my closest ally.
His newspaper group should have been fighting for the church.
They should have been on the side of the angels.
Instead of which.
They shall repent in hell fire.

Thursday, May 28, 2009

memory


In memory of Hugh Clowers Thompson, an American who showed us the way.

nameday

people like years in the city streets
throng in the rain it falls like centuries
the fall of man is never so complete
the fall of night never such a certainty
clocks are striking somewhere down the quays

as i am struck my thirtieth hour done
takes wing like a soul circles and is gone
alone amid the crowd i hear the rain
drum the outright tragedy of man
birth is death divided by a span

the real scandals

In the past year seven children have killed themselves in the North Kildare area.
It's a small region near where I live.
The children were aged 12 and 13.
They killed themselves in the towns of Maynooth, Celbridge, Kilcock and a nearby town called Lucan.
Most Irish people don't know about this story because the Irish Times, Independent Newspapers and RTE have all but ignored it.
These passionately caring liberal groups don't seem to care about a body count like this one.
Why?
Because none of the dead children, or the circumstances of their deaths, can be used to discredit the Catholic church.
Whatever else killed them, we know it wasn't Christianity.
Something in the prevailing culture of modern Ireland made seven kids, (Seven kids that we know about and can write about. There are more.) something in the prevailing culture made these seven pre teens and early teens choose to end their lives.
The prevailing culture in Ireland is RTE, Independent Newspapers and the Irish Times.
There is no other prevailing culture.
Murderers.
Murderers hiding in plain sight.
Murderers standing proudly in judgement on the Catholic Church and on the past generations.
So seven dead children is not news.
Just as the twenty children who died in Health Board care in the past few years is not news.
Yes Independent Newspapers gave the twenty dead children who met their end in Health Board care a paragraph yesterday.
In the middle of ten pages of propaganda against the Catholic church.
If you sifted through the dross of recycled sex abuse allegations, you could find out about the child murders that are happening in Health Board care today.
It's not really reporting the scandal of twenty children dying (or as I believe being killed) in Health Board care.
In fact nowhere did they deign to suggest there was a scandal.
Twenty children have died in Health Board care in Ireland.
No staff have been charged with murder.
We only know about the twenty because the Health Board has dribbled details into the public sphere.
There are more than twenty.
Murderers are notoriously shy about providing complete information about the children they kill.
We can be sure there's more than twenty.
We can bet there's more.
And there will be more.
And these killings are happening now.
To all intents and purposes, effectively unreported by the Irish Times, Independent Newspapers and RTE.
One small article, or one small mention, hidden in the middle of ten thousand anti Catholic diatribes, does not count as reportage.
Nor has there been any focus on the children who are impregnated by Heath Board workers and then smuggled over to England for abortions.
Since the Irish Times in particular, but Independent Newspapers and RTE too, have worked so hard to make abortion a part of Irish culture, it is perhaps difficult for them to honestly expose such a malign implementation of their own personal vision.
Details are scant.
We know children are being raped while in the care of the Health Board.
We know the children are then smuggled to England for abortions.
We know that no Health Board staff member has been convicted of rape or removed from his position for raping the children in his care.
It's pretty grim.
A real scandal.
Going on right now.
Almost as bad as the unexplained deaths of children in Health Board care.
The deaths I call murders.
What do you think folks?
Do you think I should wait for the government and Health Board sanctioned Enquiries to tell me what they want to tell me about how those children died before I can dare to call their deaths murders?
Nah.
I think we'll chance it.
I think we'll say what we have to say.
There's more at stake here than a delinquent media propaganda war agains the ancient and beautiful and true Catholic religion.
Children are being violated and killed before our very eyes, and our newspaper groups and television stations don't even think it's news.
While the great minds of Irish journalism clap themselves on the back at each new facile excoriation of the Catholic church, while the pseuds and trendies murmur banalities about child abuse, the real abuse, the real murder is happening right this moment in our midst.
Here are the scandals.
Seven dead children in North Kildare in the past year.
Twenty dead children in Health Board care.
Children being systematically raped and brought to England for abortions in Health Board care.
All happening now.
Independent Newspapers, RTE, and The Irish Times, you are starting to weary me.
But you do still have a duty to the truth.
All the truth.
And you are still accountable to God.
You might consider this some time at your leisure.

house party to celebrate the destruction of the Roman Catholic Church in Ireland

The Irish Independent has claimed that the current crop of sex abuse scandals first emerged in 1995.
This is a black lie.
It implies that Independent Newspapers and its allies began their present attempts to destroy the church comparatively recently.
The media groups of Ireland have in fact been endeavouring to destroy the church for at least four decades.
These media groups are not really concerned about the victims of sex abuse.
These media groups ignore 99.99 percent of sex abuse victims.
These media groups are solely concerned with sex abuse victims who can be used to create propaganda against the Catholic church.
I hope you priests and nuns are reading this.
I hope you'll think twice before you officiate at Tony O'Reilly, or Ger Collaran, or John Bowman's funerals, or weddings, or whatever plush bottomed anodyne celebration these great libertines want some Catholic credibility for.
Give them nothing.
Preach the anti Independent Newspapers crusade.
A newspaper group that owes one and a half billion quid to the banks because it has no readers, should not be in a position to terrorise us.
Ditto the readerless Irish Times which only exists on the back of government Health Board advertising..
Ditto the viewerless RTE which only exists because Catholic people are compelled by our kleptocratic Fianna Fail government to pay a licence fee to it.
Defy them.
Tell them to f--- off.
No the sex abuse scandals weren't first hijacked by Independent Newspapers, the Irish Times, and RTE in 1995.
Since the late 1970's I have been aware that Independent Newspapers, the Irish Times, and RTE, were pursuing a propaganda war against the Catholic church.
Certainly throughout the 1980's.
But much earlier too.
Patrick Kavanagh's poem about those strange pseudo elites who have struggled so long to destroy the church, actually dates from the 1950's.
Strange pseudo elites.
Sometimes I call them the media.
But really we don't know precisely what they are.
Feminist circles.
Old style communists.
Something else.
Something darker.
But they are real.
Here's what Kavanagh wrote about them.

HOUSE PARTY TO CELEBRATE THE DESTRUCTION OF THE ROMAN CATHOLIC CHURCH IN IRELAND
by Patrick Kavanagh

Her book was out, and did she devastate
The Roman Catholic Church on every page!
And in Seamus's house they met to celebrate
With giggles high the dying monster's rage.

When Seamus gazed upon this woman he
Reflected on one absolute disgrace
Outside the bounds of every decency -
'A female replica of Cromwell's face'

Was how some rural savage had described
This noble woman - she was not blotched,
Her wart was a beauty mole. He had been bribed
To rhyme his sneer. Some Bishop had been touched.

So terrible was Seamus's emotion,
The sherry glass was dancing in his hand -
The Jansenistic priesthood of the nation
Had perished by this woman writer's hand.

With fighting admiration in his eyes
He could not see his wife but only Her.
He stammered: 'You did more than satirise.
Great artist! The Irish Voltaire.'

The reviews were coming in by every post,
Warm and fulsome - Seamus read extracts:
'The Roman Catholic Hierarchy must
Be purple now with rage. She states the facts

With wit, and wit is what they cannot bear.'
In far off parishes of Cork and Kerry
Old priests walked homeless in the winter air
As Seamus poured another pale dry sherry.

in the stalls

A night at the theatre with Fenella De La Rochefoucault.
The Dublin Shakespeare Company production of Romeo And Juliet no less.
It is in the best sense of a phrase made famous by my cousin Yankee Joe, bor-r-r-r-r-r-r-r-r-r-r-r-r-r-ring.
Until Juliet arrives on the balcony.
I've dozed off but I wake up to hear:
"Johnston Press, oh Johnston Press, wherefore art thou Johnston Press? Hast thy company gone completely bust? Hast thy shares fallen through the floor? Wert thou a bunch of useless incompetent swine for presuming to fire Heelers? Wert thou a shower of worthless parvenu classless toe rags with delusions of grandeur who weren't really fit to tie up his shoe laces let alone fire him? Ah Johnston Press. What art thou? Art thou a heap of crap? For I canst not find thy shares listed anywhere. Lo prithee art thou caput? Couldn't happen to a nicer bunch of people. Maybe next time you low rent skangers will think more carefully before firing someone."
I looked at Fenella whose head was by now resting on my shoulder.
"It's starting to get good," I whispered.

Wednesday, May 27, 2009

chessnutz

(our weekly chess puzzle)
***********************
Rudolf Rassendyl versus Rupert of Hentzau.
Strelsau 1896.
*****************
White is looking quite composed but Black soon found a way to shake his complacency and steal the game. Can you see it?
****************
Solution: During intermission, Hentzau's henchmen kidnapped Rassendyl and replaced him with an exact double who threw the game.

an open letter to mary kenny and david quinn

Dear Mary Kenny and David Quinn.
For some years now you have been the token Catholics at Tony O'Reilly's Independent Newspapers group.
You have worn your Catholicism on your sleeves as it were.
At every opportunity you have reminded your readers of your commitment to the church.
Yet your presence on the staff of Independent Newspapers has served to allow that deeply vehemently and malignly anti Catholic organisation to portray itself as a civilised and credible commentator on events.
Tell me.
Have you any response, either of you, to Ian O'Doherty's egregiously false assertion in last week's Irish Independent that the Catholic church is a paedophile ring?
The Irish Independent published O'Doherty's assertion in a headline over his article, and permitted him to repeat the assertion in the article itself.
Does such a glib snide malicious and mendacious falsehood have any relevance to two such as yourselves who have posed as Catholics for so long?
Or is your Catholicism merely a meal ticket.
Besties.
James Healy

Tuesday, May 26, 2009

strangers on a plane

I felt her before I saw her.
A sensation of joylessness engulfed my spirit.
I looked up.
She sat in the aisle seat beside me.
Our eyes met.
And suddenly I felt terribly sad.
There was nothing wrong with her.
I'm certainly not inclined to go casting aspersions on anyone else for their appearance.
It wasn't her appearance.
It was just a feeling I had.
An overwhelming feeling of joylessness.
She told me she was a radio presenter with RTE, the Irish national broadcaster.
I recognised her name and radio programme.
She was famous in Ireland.
We talked.
I couldn't resist suggesting to her that the news room in RTE was controlled by an extreme left wing organisation which had formerly been working for the Soviet Union.
"It was never that bad," she shot back.
I asked what she meant.
"There was no one group in charge," she explained. "One organisation had control of news. Another bunch had control of documentaries."
Ah yes.
You must understand what she was telling me bold readers.
She wasn't denying that RTE had been infiltrated and manipulated during the Cold War by a terrorist sympathising anti American communist group.
She was saying that actually two such groups had carried out just such an infiltration, and since they despised each other, the plurality and objectivity of discourse within RTE broadcasting was preserved.
Or so she believed.
It's a funny old rock and roll world.
I was reminded of her tonight.
John Bowman's anti Catholic pseudo discussion programme entitled Questions And Answers was on air.
I couldn't help wondering who was directing the anti Catholic agendas pursued by the programme so shamelessly for decades, and financed every step of the way by a licence fee imposed on Catholics and other citizens by our corrupt kleptocratic Fianna Fail government.
The programme tonight featured some high drama.
An old man was shouting from the audience that he had been raped by priests while a child.
It was a clever piece of propaganda.
No one dared to speak against him.
At one point he screamed about how he had wanted to commit suicide.
The entire audience and panel was cowed.
As RTE continues to recycle old allegations of abuse, producing this fellow live on air, meant that no one in the audience or on the miserably craven panel, would say a word about the current manipulation of sex abuse cases to attack the church.
They probably wouldn't have spoken up anyway.
John Bowman doesn't allow much variety on his panels.
Normally we get five lefties, a liberal atheist and a commie.
That's what RTE calls balance.
And tonight if perchance there was someone in the studio with reservations about RTE and the Irish media's renewed targeting of the Catholic church, none would dare voice their objections.
Not now they wouldn't.
The sex abuse victim planted in the audience was RTE's trump card.
The perfect Trojan horse.
A genuine victim too dim to know he was being used.
He ensured one thing.
There would be no exposition on the manner in which the tiny minority of sex abuse cases involving clerical people have been constantly rehashed on national television, while the vast majority of cases, occurring right now in family households, schools and Health Board institutions all over Ireland, the vast majority of cases, involving sexual abuse, satanic abuse, infanticide and murder, the vast majority of cases I say, are absolutely ignored.
It is worth noting that sex abuse levels in Ireland today are at record highs.
It is worth noting that the murder of children is also at record levels.
It is worth noting that the generation of today who have passed a blanket sentence of guilt on the generation of yesterday, are themselves presiding over the greatest violations of children and adults, women, men and old age pensioners, the most malign and atrocious subjugations of human beings I tell you, in our 1500 year history as a nation.
Remember the chap in Wexford who murdered his wife and two kids recently?
All known to social services.
But the great humanitarian liberals would never dream of breaking up a family.
Remember the woman starving her mother to death in the family home?
Remember the baby being made paraplegic by his mother's boyfriend throwing him across the room?
Remember all the dead babies?
There's been a lot in recent years.
Not that they get much publicity on RTE.
Remember the five children aged twelve and thirteen killing themselves near where I live?
What on earth have the atheistic liberals of RTE, Independent Newspapers, The Irish Times, and our ruling cultural and political elites, what on earth have they done to Ireland that pre teen children prefer to die rather than to live?
We'll find out one day.
The only thing we can say for sure is that those children didn't kill themselves because they felt oppressed by Catholic values.
Because RTE, Independent Newspapers and The Irish Times have so trahaised and marginalised Catholicism that it's a safe bet these kids barely had any awareness of our beautiful inspiring life affirming Christian heritage.
Let me honestly endeavour to serve the people of Ireland by speaking the truth as I see it.
Here is the news.
RTE, Independent Newspapers and The Irish Times are not interested in the vast majority of sex abuse cases, that is to say they are not interested in the cases which don't involve clerical or religious abusers, because these cases will not help RTE break the Catholic church.
Members of the legal profession, lawyers, solicitors, barristers et al, are not interested in the vast majority of sex abuse cases because the lawyers, solicitors, barristers et al, are only interested in the pennies Catholics put in the collection plate and in any cases that will help them get their hands on those pennies.
Politicians are not interested in the vast majority of sex abuse cases because to even begin to address them, to even begin to tackle the levels of sex abuse that have been unleashed by our current atheistic porno drug culture, to even for a moment see things as they really are, would mean fighting a battle requiring real courage, real sacrifice, and a real willingness to risk one's life and career with no certain prospect of reward.
Oh sons and daughters of Ireland, these people are nothing.
Do not bow to them.
Do not bow to the scoundrels, the conformist anti Catholic radicals of RTE, Independent Newspapers, The Irish Times, the political parties, and their attendant pseudo intellectual elites.
Do not bow to them.
You didn't bow to Joe Stalin.
You didn't bow to Hitler.
You didn't bow to Henry the Eighth.
Why in heaven would you bow to the pious falsehoods of John Bowman and his coterie of Dublin Four atheistic tripe hounds?
They are nothing.
They only have power because power has been given to them.
For a little while.
They are nothing.
Do not bow to them.
Defy them.
You have chosen the better part.
Go upon your way.
Rejoicing.

Monday, May 25, 2009

the ineluctable modality of fender benders

Warm sunshine on the river Liffey.
Paused in traffic along the quays of Dublin.
I am five minutes from the car park.
I see her coming in my rearview.
Little blue Nissan bubble car.
Getting closer.
Presently I realise she ain't stopping.
She wakes up at the last minute and jams on the brakes.
There is a crunch as her car impacts with mine.
Somewhat wearily Ireland's greatest living poet exits his vehicle.
He looks around briefly at the cars alongside whose drivers have witnessed the collision.
They speed away.
Almost apologetically.
But they do speed away.
The driver of the other car approaches me.
She is crying.
Young girl.
Maybe early twenties.
Student.
"Boo hoo," she says, "I'm so sorry, boo hoo."
I launch into my Errol Flynn routine.
"Oh come on," I say with a big reassuring smile. "Neither of us are hurt. Nothing else matters."
(Cary Grant routine surely? - Ed note.)
I notice she has a rather pleasantly curvaceous form, garbed in a finely woven short skirt which reveals equally pleasantly tapering silken clad legs.
Women have legs.
Who would have thunk it.
She stops crying.
"My boyfriend will be furious," she murmurs apparently in reference to the car.
Ah yes bold readers.
She boyfriended me.
Fully thirty seconds after ramming my car, she felt the urgent need to convey to me the information that she had a boyfriend.
A new low.
Thirty seconds after the crash.
"My boyfriend will be furious."
Just slipped into the conversation like.
Hoo boy.
Heelers dazzles another love struck waif.
We swap insurance details and phone the cops.
As we stand in the road, some of the more gormless drivers in the Republic of Ireland honk their horns at us.
The girl does her best to look unperturbed.
I do my best not to look at her legs.
The police arrive after half an hour.
They're very professional and polite.
I feel a bit guilty about my earlier attempts to highlight deaths in the basements of police stations, deaths at the side of the road when people were being interviewed by police, and sundry other intimidations, violations and assaults, that have occurred at the hands of corrupt Irish cops recently.
The police officers who attended at the scene of my accident are one hundred per cent fautless.
Me and the girl who crashed into me were both damn happy to have them there.
After a few minutes cops and crashed car drivers bid their adieus.
I drive back to the Chateau de Healy.
The Dad meets me in the garden and I tell him what has transpired.
"You won't believe this," sez the Dad. "But I had a premonition something like that was going to happen to you."
I goggled mildly.
"No way," sez I.
The Dad nods vigorously.
"I did," he insists. "For a few days now. It was just a feeling that you were going to be in some sort of trouble on the road. This morning I was even going to advise you to take my car."
I favour the Dad with a searching look.
"Dad old pal," sez I, "I'm always more impressed with premonitions that I hear about it before the events that are being foretold actually come to pass. In future if you have any intimations from the other side that I'm about to be in a car crash, would you kindly let me know in advance?"

an open letter to tony o'reilly proprietor of independent newspapers

Dear Tone.
Some matters I need to discuss with you.

1. Various newspapers in your group carried claims yesterday about increased readership figures. I found these figures hard to believe. Tell me one thing. If The Irish Independent, The Sunday Independent, The Evening Herald, The Sunday World, and The Daily Star are all selling fifty million copies a day, why then is the share price of Independent Newspapers currently at 13 cents? Why does the combined debt of all your titles come to a sum total of one and a half billion smackeroonies? Look into this.

2. Yesterday at midday I published an article on The Heelers Diaries about a Libyan terrorist who'd been given an Irish passport by our kleptocratic Fianna Fail government. Yesterday at 4pm I discovered an article on the same topic in The Evening Herald by Mr Cormac Looney. The article was better researched than anything I've ever written in my life. You should hang on to Mr Cormac Looney. He will make you a lot of money. But the editorial angle was similar to mine. To wit, your reporter asked why the Libyan terrorist had been given an Irish passport, and then having been given one, why he was allowed to keep it after details of his Al Qaeda activities emerged. O'Reilly are your staff lifting editorial angles from The Heelers Diaries? Look into this.

3. I turned the page from Mr Cormac Looney's excellent article and found a feature column by Mr Con Houlihan. For a moment I was rather pleased with Independent Newspapers for publishing a writer of Mr Houlihan's calibre. You'll have to forgive me O'Reilly. Being pleased with Independent Newspapers is a new emotion for me. I don't quite know how to handle it. However it didn't last long. Your editorial staff had given Mr Houlihan a byline which read: "Ireland's Greatest Living Man Of Letters." Well, well, well O'Reilly. Even you might see the similarity between this epithet and the epithet on the mast head of The Heelers Diaries. Tell me O'Reilly. Are your drones in Sektor Sieben Gah (The Evening Herald) lifting epithets from my blog? Look into this.

4. Your newspaper The Irish Independent is currently carrying articles by a Mr David Quinn who purports to be a Catholic. O'Reilly I've been wondering was Mr Quinn appointed to your staff because I had been writing openly that Independent Newspapers is a vilely vituperatively blatently anti Catholic organisation. Is David Quinn a token Catholic? Who do you think you're fooling? Look into this O'Reilly.

5. In the same cafe where I found a free copy of The Evening Herald yesterday, I found a copy of The Daily Star, over which I understand you also have some sort of lien. I was puzzled to note the ongoing presence of phone sex lines in The Daily Star. How can this be? Did not Ger Colleran the editor of The Daily Star claim in a false and cowardly manner on Irish national television some years ago that children had been abused in every Catholic church presbytery in Ireland? Is it not inconsistent on the part of such a moral giant as Ger Colleran to permit the publishing of phone sex lines? Could this same legendary Ger Colleran now really be editing for you, a newspaper which disseminates phone sex lines trumpeting the services of "girls," and "teenage girls." Do the "girls" running these phone sex lines actually work from The Daily Star's offices? Or do you just accept money for providing the advert? I mean, are you just pimps or actually whore masters? What age are the "girls" who feature on the phone sex lines advertised in The Daily Star? What circumstances do they work in? What are their direct bosses like? Do you make any efforts to check? What does "Talk You Off" mean? All this is very unseemly O'Reilly. You know that personally I consider phone sex lines to be part of a societal dynamic which creates dysfunction and disruption in both male and female sexualties, thereby leading to sex abuse. Do you agree with my opinion on this O'Reilly? How would you feel if one of your sons or daughters was working on a phone sex line, or worse still, experiencing life through the use of phone sex lines? Makes you think doesn't it? Have a word with the immortal Ger Colleran this week. Make sure no more phone sex lines appear in The Daily Star. Do it for me O'Reilly.

James Healy

************
(Originally published 5th March 2009.)

Sunday, May 24, 2009

Independence Day

Will Smith pudding and pie,
Shot all the space aliens and made them cry,
But when the Jihadis came out to play,
Will Smith stayed at home in his plush penthouse apartment in the Hollywood Hills making snide remarks about President Bush.